New Script

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Your thoughts please :)

5pm, train station, outside, snowing

A large train passes the station (windswept papers tumble in its wake).  The stationmaster walks over to a ragged looking man at the station.  The stationmaster rolls his eyes.  The ragged man (Charlie) is standing by the tracks, shivering and frightened.

Stationmaster

“Alright Charlie, it’s cold out.  Don’t you want to go home?  It’s been a long day”

The stationmaster puts his hand on Charlie’s shoulder.   Shivering, Charlie shakes his head no.  His eyes are wide with fear

“It’s comin’ to get me…”

The stationmaster looks slightly impatient with Charlie. 

“Now Charlie, you know it’s not coming.  Didn’t come yesterday, or the week before that, or the-“

Charlie interrupts, grabbing the stationmaster’s coat.

“Don’t ya understand?  It’s comin’ fer me...”

The stationmaster is startled by this sudden outburst.  He looks at the old man in disbelief.  Charlie walks towards the tracks, now solemn.  He takes his hat off.

“It’s because of Clem..he shouldn’t a cheated at cards. that’s why I done it…and now...”

Charlie trails off, and clutches his hat.  Concerned, the stationmaster walks up the Charlie and puts his hand on his shoulder.

“C’mon Charles, I think you’re a little tired”

The old man hugs himself and shivers.

“There’s no point runnin’ anymore.  It’s found me this time.”

The stationmaster looks concerned, then confused.  Sizzle sounds are coming from the tracks.  He looks down to the tracks.  The snow falling on the tracks evaporates after hitting the metal.  The tracks start to shake.  The sounds of an approaching train issue from the left tunnel.  The Stationmaster looks back to the tracks, which have turned red-hot.  Large plumes of red steam issue from the tunnel.  Train sounds get louder.  A large blazing hell train blasts out of the tunnel.  It’s covered in fire and smoke.  The souls of the tormented can be seen on the train’s body and in the windows.  The stationmaster falls to the ground in fear, covers his face, and waits for the train to pass.  The train sounds grow faint, and the snow begins to fall again.  The stationmaster looks up.  Charlie is gone.  The Stationmaster looks down at the tracks, and sees Charlie’s hat, with a couple dollars floating in the breeze.  The stationmaster picks up Charlie’s hat, and pulls two playing cards out of the brim.  He looks at them, dumbstruck, and then back at the train tunnel.

end

Also, found some clips.  check 'em out!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nYSbxRiUgOo

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lmC_tvMHTzg

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PGzghUQRVk8